"the way life should be"

today i really miss camp memories and all my favorites so i would like to take a moment to remember some fabulous times and let you all know how much i love you!

lynde- remember when we would make ridiculous noises over the radios and annoy people? and sit around the fire yelling at the older girls to be quiet when we were really just gossiping and eating lots of marshmallows. oh and of course your unforgettable blister exploding all over dentons face, and our impression of bob running over ogie (ohhh nooooooooooooo). NYE SF! we need to start planning our next trip.

julia- i miss work crew and how hilarious it was. orange hats. party on the beach (lynde getting practically naked and sitting on you). you prancing around pretending your knee was healed. our crazy nicknames. "this is why WE'RE HOTT". adventures in new hampshire, north carolina and now california. you're such a great friend :)

snoopie poopie- putting human characteristics upon animals, specifically seagulls. riding the gator. "meyum meyum meyum". the OUJI board (i think i spelled it wrong). hide and seek in the playhouse with tony. mulch. polyeurothaning the lodge approximately 4 times. cold wet rainy days and space heaters in oak. you witnessing a small french boy stripping on the tennis courts.

wes- running together. texting. ghost riding. laughing and sitting outside the staff lounge in our spot. our obsession w. merrit and his lawn mower. learning so much.

denton- i miss saying your name to the tune of mario..."dentondentondenton". pats pizza. riculous work crew memories. putting the docks together. when are you moving to california?

toenails- i miss our meetings in manch vegas during the off season. speeding through red lights. me trying to push you over and never succeeding. work crew tv nights and diving to the bottom of the lake to find the morrings (or watching you do it). big buck hunter. watching you ride around in the gator de-bugging camp. releasing the hounds.

doug- lifeguarding course. being an hour late to it. 9 nipples. you walking around and explaining in detail what everyone in your sight was doing.

phil- you breaking multiple benches, a boat, a cabin, and everything in your sight basically. you crack me up.

ryan- your stench. fun in portsmouth for the KP reunion. the north carolina state fair...ew. california love.

alice- don't even know where to begin. i'll start w/ trackie bottoms. your bug bites and vaseline. AS IF! our adventures in london. skinny dipping. family camp. rattlesnake memories from back in '05. you dancing to britney spears in the playhouse in the most ridiculous outfit i'd ever seen. such good days.

james and aidan- best foreign boys i know. such great times at the beach, on the boats, staff lounge craziness. rattlesnake adventures, family camp. how about that time we all piled into my studio apartment and could hardly breath it was so hot and sweaty.

GW- gosh....how about work crew 06. chopping lots of wood, drinking starbucks. being late in the morning. you losing your glasses in the lake. trips to portland. piling into a tent at the launch pad and trying to talk to spirits in the rain.

danimal- the SCAB. orangie 1. orangie 2. orangie 3. the funerals. you getting pulled over in my saab. laughter in general.

you only meet your once in a lifetime friend once in a lifetime

"i believe that one friend can save you from total misery"- from the book stone garden... i believe it too.

thank you jenelle for always being there. 11 years and you are STILL listening to my crap. i don't know how to thank you enough. i seriously don't think i would be sane without you as my friend<3

dog bites and side mirrors

picnic in berkeley:

belle decides to attack two foreign people sitting on a blanket (when i say attack, i mean with kisses). the couple starts SCREAMING as if belle is some sort of beast about to eat them alive. i've honestly never seen anyone react to a dog that way before! especially one thats trying to give them kisses, not canines in their flesh.

erin, lara and i start walking towards the actual dog park and we hear "CRACK". surely that was the sound of a biker smashing into someones side-view mirror. sure enough, a homeless looking bicyclist crashed into MY side view mirror while i happened to be walking by. i honestly had no idea what to do, so i shrugged my shoulders and walked on.

we enter the dog park and chill for a bit. theres this woman, about 30 maybe, carrying a really old cocker spaniel in her arms while her other dog played. a pack of dogs starts heading towards her, she's not looking and BAM her legs are taken out from under her and she's airborn and hits the ground all the while not letting go of the dog (who isn't even phased by the event whatsoever). i honestly had to bite my tongue because the dog's reaction, or lack there of, was just classic! his ears flew up as they were falling and his facial expression was as if he was thinking "welp, we're goin down i guess.....?"


dog park in mill valley:

i'm standing watching the dogs play when two dogs start trying to play with belle. she doesn't seem to like it all and starts to snarl and do her whole screaming "get the fuck away from me!!!!" deal. the dogs decide to attack so i grab belle while the other owners grab their dogs and belle's SO riled up that she lunges to bite one of the dogs but instead latches onto my arm and CLAMPS down full force. seriously, who bites their mom? then some lady from across the park decides that she wants to walk all the way over to tell me how i didn't handle the situation properly and that i shouldnt reprimand belle because she didnt do anything wrong and that it's gonna mess her up mentally.

THEN belle decides to chase a dog about a quarter of a mile down the path away from the dog park so i had to chase her yelling and screaming in my boots and pea coat all pissed off. my dog is NOT behaving and it's most likely all my fault. great.

pixie dust

when i was little i used to go outside at dusk with pixie dust (handfuls of sand from the backyard) and call for peter pan to come and take me away to never never land. i'd sprinkle the pixie dust over my head and wish for him to appear in the sky. my mom loves to remind me of this. lately i feel like that little girl again, wishing for someone to come and take me away where nothing hurts anymore, where i don't have to feel disappointed or alone, and where nobody can break my heart.

gone west

Together so long; now it's over and I have disappeared.
Not only from your house, from the state, but from your mind.
I called, I wrote, I needed you, and I waited for days.
You let me down.

"Best friends", you said, "we were always better friends anyway".
And I believed you.
You can erase the title; you can erase my picture and my things and my scent,
You can throw it all away: all of the things I left behind,
You can vaccum up all of the atoms of our love,
But you will never be able to rid yourself of us, not completely.
Someday when you're the one discouraged and alone and feeling unloved, you'll need to hear the voice of the girl who loved you most;
But she will be gone.
Two thousand miles west now, even further from your heart;
I only wish you had answered.